Privacy and Boys

I have a couple things to talk about today; Privacy and Boys.

Privacy:

My favourite thing about living away from my parents is my privacy. I have this whole apartment to myself. I can dance, sing, play games and walk around naked if I wanted to (not that I actually do that... on a regular basis). But ever since last week when I had a mental breakdown I haven't be able to shake my Mom. I asked her to come in because it was a Monday and I didn't really want to be left alone. On Friday, I went back to GB to see my friends. I spent most of my time with my friends. Now today, my parents have come in because my Dad has meetings so my mom is staying with me while my Dad is staying at a hotel. lets just say I can't wait for tuesday. I know people think I'm horrible for saying that because some people don't have parents. But honestly I don't have as good of a relationship with them as they think. it's sad to say but I don't even miss them. I miss my friends more then my parents. Next year when my friends move in town with me they will probably see me on holidays Christmas, maybe spring break and maybe the summer. I like my privacy and unfortunately this past week I haven't been able to get it and it's starting to get to me. Which only means my parents should be ready for sauce.

Boys:

So lately besides the fact that I've been annoyed by no privacy I've been getting. I've been in a happy mood. For the past 4/5 months I've gone without liking anyone and now I like someone.  So instead of getting my hopes up thinking that well maybe this guy has feelings for me I think No. He probably doesn't have feelings for me because I have no confidence and how is a guy supposed to be confident in dating me if I have no confidence in myself. So I'm going to do something about it. I'm using it as positive impact. I'm using a guy as motivation to do the changes on myself that i had planned to do before I moved in here.  I know people say it's wrong to change for a guy, but what if it's helping you too?

I'm pretty sure thats all I had to say for today.

I Am J Stans.

My Weight Loss Promise

I wish I was weighed less. I have to be honest with myself. Although I keep telling myself I'm happy, in all truths, I'm not. I also realize I'm lazy. I want to lose the weight but I'm not willing to work for it. Well.. that is about to change my friends. I plan on working as hard as I can to lose this weight. I will be happy. I am going to walk every day and try to eat as healthy as possible, This is a promise I am making to myself. I have to do this. I can't just stand by anymore. Wish me luck.

I Am J Stans

A friday blog... unfinished

Today is english class we were discussing "Obasan" and "Stones". These are short stories. One is about the chinese or japanese and how they used to get mistreated by Canadians and the other is the effects of war on a solider and his family. We discussed  about how if we were put in that situation we would probably act the same way. Well I had a thought. I kept this thought to myself because I'm not one for speaking out during class. Basically I thought about that if someone asked us would we act the same way, more then likely we respond saying no we wouldn't. But would we really? How can we really answer that question truthfully unless we knew what it was like to be in that situation. In most cases there is a pretty good chance we would act the same way as them.


Note: I started this on friday and I wasn't able to finish until today and I lost my train of thought. Sorry

I Am J Stans

Bad Days and all of their glory.

Bad Days. I don't know what it's like for most people but I tend to have a multiple amounts of bad days. Maybe I have an unheard of disease known as baddayiouses or maybe it's just when I wake up and something turns out bad I am determined that the rest of the day will likely turn out the same way. Low and behold, I'm usually right. But truthfully I know it's my own fault. Since I have already predetermined that the rest of my day will turn out completely wrong I am more then likely to do things that make it seem that way or I will view things with more of a negative twist then it truly is. What I'm trying to say is that although I am a full believer in everything happens for a reason some little things like having some trouble with a printer or internet can be turned into something completely negative if we are expecting it to happen. For example: Say you wake up one morning and stub your toe ultimately, not only are you in aggravating pain, but your cursing and swearing and more then likely getting pretty mad. After the pain has gone away you'll probably end up saying "Just my luck, another bad day." Now stop right there, how can you tell if your having a bad day if you haven't lived it yet. 9 chances out of 10 your not psychic. So truly you have no idea if the rest of the day will be bad or not. But what you have done is set up for a bad day. As you get ready your going to be grumpy and focusing on the fact that your day will more then likely turn out bad. So instead of focusing on the task at hand you begin to get clumsy and aren't doing anything right, which on a normal case is a sure sign that so far your day is going terribly. Finally your all dressed and you leave the house and about to walk/drive to school/work when just when you get out the door you find out it's pouring. Your would probably say at this point "Just my luck!" figuring that just because your having a bad day it has to rain. But really if you had watch the 6 o'clock news the night before you would have known about the chance of showers or if you looked out your window you would have been prepared. So finally your day is done and you back at home all ready to relax. But, before you can do that you have dishes to do so you start the dishes and since your still focuses on that fact that your day has been bad you will fumble with a few or even drop a dish or two. Once thats over with, you head to bed to watch TV. This is the only time of day you can really say that you've had a bad day. Let me repeat that THIS IS THE ONLY TIME, not in the morning or mid after noon. What you can say in the morning if you stub your toe is "Oh great what a lovely start to a morning. I hope the rest of the day doesn't turn out this way." Then you go off on your merry way thinking nothing of it. You may tell a friend or two but you realize it's nothing major. If you continue to have a "bad day" then around midday you can say "Well that's just great, so far my day has been horrible."But again you're just addressing it your not really thinking anything of it. So, basically what I've been trying to say within all this mumbo-jumbo is... If your NOT psychic then 9 chances out of 10 you are predetermining a bad day when truly if it wasn't for the thought in your mind the entire day that it's going to go horribly it probably would be so bad or you probably wouldn't be able to view it as bad. Just try and keep that little thought in your head next time your "having a bad day". I know I will be.

I Am J Stans

Television and it's quirks.

TV. Something many of us take advantage of. But for those of us who are pulling our hair out on a weekday night because we don't have a channel that is showing our favourite show, well, we no longer take advantage of that. The unfortunate part is that although many people are having the same problem as I am tonight, no one has the decency to stream channels so that anyone can watch them from all over the world and not just those trying to watch in the states. Although thankful to Youtube, we are able to watch them the day after at most times they don't have the final most crucial minutes from the show and you have to go to some other website to watch them. But instead of being able to freely watch the show on this site you have to fill out a survey. I miss the days when there weren't so many channels and it was simple to watch your favourite show at night. But then again maybe I'm full of BS and you don't give a shit that some 18 year old University student can't watch any CW shows on her TV because she doesn't have the channel. But then again, if you made it this far you probably give a shit about what I'm saying and thats all that matters.

I Am J Stans